I'm Okay if You Say No.

Everyone that knows me understands that I don't like missing out on opportunities and I especially don't like leaving money on the table. I keep multiple streams of income going and I have always had a high octane can of energy.

It took me a while to get into the place where I am comfortable when potential clients pass me over and chose another vendor for their events. I admit that I once would be sad when friends, relatives, and associates would have an event and I wasn't even asked if I would like to be their supplier for the evening.

I am a dedicated person who works hard in my field and I strive for excellence in everything I do. I say this to what end? I no longer let being passed over upset me. There are tons of reasons that people may want a different vendor or service and those reasons may not actually have anything to do with me personally, my pricing, or other such reason.

I have had clients who wanted me to cut my pricing, given them the 'hook up', questioned why my prices are what they are, tried to guilt trip me into lowering my price, or just wasn't a good client to have at that time.  Just as clients have a choice of who they want to work with, I too have the same choices about what customers I want to work with or not.

Just recently, I did a tasting for a clients in short notice. The party planner that booked me is one in which I have worked with for several years, and she was confident that this event would be one that the client would have loved to have my service. Alas, this was not the case and I suspected so once I had met them at my door. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. The party planner emailed me with a list of concerns that the client expressed to her after our meeting. I simply responded that I didn't wish to prove or disprove the issues expressed in the email because I felt that it would be a waste of my valuable time. They declined and that's okay.

Most of the 'issues' expressed were not fair, not understandable, and not relevant to the question of weather or not I was able to satisfy their needs for the event. The biggest issue, and the only one I will cite here, was that I have a pet and she was lose in the house. After having asked if they had any aversion to my cat and/or wanted her to be in her kennel, they said no. Therefore, how was this on their list of reasons to decline.

I provide excellence at every turn possible, and when I don't think that I can provide it, I have no issues expressing my concerns. Getting to this mental and professional state only came to me with my growing maturity. Beforehand, I often would kick myself about someone passing me over, or I would feel the tug and pull to give price concessions just to secure that I would win the order. Every time I  stuck my neck out for someone else's event, without a doubt, I regretted it. I once worked up a menu for a so-called friend's birthday and I didn't earn a dime for my efforts, only to have her make a list of complaints afterwards. She knew there was no where else, and nobody else, that would have done such things for that small amount of money.

Such is life, you live long enough, you will learn to value your work and time as a precious commodity worthy of honorarium. Cash talks and b.s. walks.